Live that life of Love

What really makes our lives matter?

It is how we have passed the moments we have been provided. Did we truly live, or rather cower in fear, did we judge another and excuse our follies at the cost of minimizing the worth of someone else  or maybe conclude that they are simply wrong by opinion, did we lift the weary or extend a hand to the weak. Did we love as we are wired to do so.

 ...Life is precious!

We all to often take for granted things we feel will always be there. We forsake the opportunity to show who we are and acknowledge another who is truly not as different from us as we try to convince ourselves. Remember we only have one life, but a lifetime is the compilation of the moments and the things that we do with the breathe we are presently gifted. We can make a difference when we choose to give rather that to take.

How disappointment is a stepping stone and how we can honor it.

Disappointment as a stepping stone. 

Disappointment is something we all feel from time to time. As unpleasant as it may be, disappointment like all else has an important role in our development. It is a part of the experiential whole that stays our equality as human beings. Where disappointment can hurt us deeply, it also has the potential to cultivate our hope. 

There are times when the disappointments we feel, can conjure up emotions so intense, they may seem beyond our very capacity to manage. As true as this may be, it is reassuring to know that as emotional it is, it will not, and cannot take hold of you, without you giving it way. 
The truth is, we make that choice to steep in our emotions or not, so we must be careful. Energy flows where focus goes and as such, it will continue to drive your emotions and ultimately determine how you feel. 

What a comfort it is to know that happiness and sorrow, cannot co-exist. At any present moment, you are simply either in a state of joy or you are not. Granted, there are gradient levels of our feelings that will always require consideration, but I say with great reassurance, if it is happiness that you seek, then happiness can always be found within the spectrum of gratitude. One's reality is always subjective to perception. Why is that, and how can anything be right in such case? It is because the energy given towards your thoughts will drive emotion, is that is what will manifest. Those thoughts you have and focus on, will always determine the outcome of your feelings.

We are creatures of feeling and instinct, programmed to respond in a mode of fight or flight for the sole purpose of assisting in our survival. To parallel that, we are also programed to be content and safe. So our brain, an ally, directs us to seek the sensation of satisfaction and peace.

So what we can do different: Remember the smallest deviation in our behavior can bring about the greatest change.

I would encourage you, and anyone you know, to try your very best to stay in harmony with the emotions and feelings that support the outcome and results you want to see in your life. 
Remembering that disappointment is merely a stepping stone on our journey. Do not lose site, never give up, and understand that you cannot "lose" hope, but by your actions it can be dismissed. 

It is true when there is a will, there is a way. Things take time, and whether immediate or somewhere in a hard to see future, your collective moments permit you to evaluate efforts and breed encouragement by simply doing your best. 

Remind yourself from time to time that the lives we live are rich with experience both of challenges and joy. In the momentum of life, there will always be ups and downs. 
So keep trying, keep moving. You cannot move forward and backward simultaneously. But what you concentrate on will produce the results of your application. Let your thoughts, hopes and dreams continue to support and instigate the life you want to create, share and live. 
And last, honor disappointment for what it is. It is a constant element in life, but give it credit where it is due. Honor your feelings, love yourself and let go of the things that get in the way of what it is you want to feel. There is always, "that next step" to you getting what it is that you truly desire.

Life, happens collectively, but overcoming disappointment requires you to take one thought, one second, one moment at a time, to ultimately get you to the the contentment and satisfaction you are looking for in the now and moving forward.

"Maybe Yes, May be No..."

The Parable of the Chinese Farmer 

Once there was a Chinese farmer who worked his poor farm together with his son and their horse. When the horse ran off one day, neighbors came to say, “How unfortunate for you!” The farmer replied, “Maybe yes, maybe no.”

When the horse returned, followed by a herd of wild horses, the neighbors gathered around and exclaimed, “What good luck for you!” The farmer stayed calm and replied, “Maybe yes, maybe no.”

While trying to tame one of wild horses, the farmer’s son fell, and broke his leg. He had to rest up and couldn’t help with the farm chores. “How sad for you,” the neighbors cried. “Maybe yes, maybe no,” said the farmer.

Shortly thereafter, a neighboring army threatened the farmer’s village. All the young men in the village were drafted to fight the invaders. Many died. But the farmer’s son had been left out of the fighting because of his broken leg. People said to the farmer, “What a good thing your son couldn’t fight!” “Maybe yes, maybe no,” was all the farmer said.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have had the opportunity to teach the principle of judging decisions on occasion. This has to be one of my more favorite concepts that we all somehow fail to realize. However, once you become aware of it, it becomes a wonderful tool to use in self-love, acceptance, building confidence and helping our understanding of things around us.

Like this parable, the farmer leans towards an attitude of acceptance rather than judgement. Maybe it is generalizing, but I do believe we tend to toil over decision making. But if that weren't enough, when the outcome of our decision is less than expected. We then proceed to beat ourselves up for making what we now classify as the "WRONG" decision, and berate ourselves for our masterful ability to make poor choices with amazing consistency.

I dare say, but this is an absolute falsehood; and I will explain. 

-We make hundreds and thousands of decisions on a daily bases. To say that we cannot make good choices is really something that needs to be reflected on accurately. More than likely, the evidence of your decision making experiences would prove a greater rate in successful choices than not. So what goes wrong? Is it us, is it the experience itself, or is it actually in the expectation.

Well, the truth is, we err in our tendency to judge a decision based on its outcome, rather than the information that we used to make it in the first place. 

...Let's say you are in a bit of a hurry, so you choose to drive down a back road to avoid the rush hour traffic in the hopes of saving some time. You approach the street, and make your turn to find that there is a road crew fixing a pot hole in right in the middle of the street. 
They stop you, and you find yourself delayed by the work before you now, rather than the rush hour traffic after all. 

So now, be honest, what would you say to yourself. What does your inner-self dialogue truly sound like, and yes, how do you now perceive the success of your decision. 

This is where we stand to open our understanding. For with all the facts in place, you had no idea that they were there, nor would you have any reason to have expected them working on the back street at that particular moment. 

Had they not been, would you have praised yourself for your clever and quick wit thinking. Or when things did and do not go your way, do you then beat yourself up as if you should've been expected to have had more, or better information than actually you did? 

So what is my point and what should we bring to the table the next time you make a decision. It is simple. Make the best decision that you can in the moment that you have with whatever information is available. Do it with the acceptance that in all actuality, you do not have control of any outcome. This is the reality that we all live in. Choices are good in the moment which you do your best making them. If they do not go your way, remember, there is something to be learned. They (the outcomes) are always opportunities of learning and growth, but judge it to be nothing more. 

We are all human, and there will always exist a natural consequence to the things we do. Those too, are opportunities to grow, good or bad. But praise yourself for making decisions, and have the awareness to grow from each and every one. This is your life, your moment, and you and I, well all of us are all working to become the best self we can be one decision at a time.

much love...sj

ORENDA

I am so in love with this word.

 ...It & it's definition is embedded within my soul. 

...Sometimes even beautiful words sufficient, can only sing meaning. 

but accomplish nothing more without the soul.   -sj

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER

How does one come about the friendship we call "the best".  I struggle to find balance in a world where we are all so beautifully unique, yet at the same time everything we interpret in life is subject to perception. As a result of this there truly cannot exist any one uniform aspect of reason. Rain or shine, trouble or peace, hurt or excited, to truly never be alone is quite the feat. One of the most common complaints of youth today in recent studies show the overwhelming sense that they are truly alone.

The Great Two:

I love these two and ponder what and from where is the source of their magic.

Maybe, the real beauty behind Calvin and Hobbs is the lack of vulnerability that exists in a friend who you know with surety is always there, even when you don't want them to be, but in the most perfect way they still are.

The friend that who without anything but comforting words can take from the weight of our daily load. Who can call you out without hurt or offense. ...IT goes on. 

Given enough thought, I'd say we all need to nurture the little part of Calvin and Hobbs inside each of us that we can, and adapt that, into all aspects of the relationships we have the privilege of being a part of.

Where there are so many people in this world. How fortunate are we to have the ones in our lives that we do. When given the odds, it seems like no encounter, no kind word, shared moment and lifetime involvement to have possibly been an accident of misfortune.

Treasure this! I know I will do my best to as well. Maybe one day I'll find my very own Hobbs as well.

WANTED: Good Leaders Now

 I admire so much these qualities. I hope it to be said of my life I embodied and magnified them.

Goodwill Hunting

When trying to understand "a feeling" I was having, the only word that I could really connect with it was Gratitude. It seems I think about this in so many different ways, but it is a constant
...The more I dwelled, the more I had to acknowledge the countless layers this word actually represents; and the time it takes to explore them all is plenty. So I started here:

How long does it really take to understand the practice of "Cognitive Gratitude"?

-These benefits and quantified moments and what they look like collectively, was the direction I seemed to be going.

These question also made me wonder if we understand the real significance of "a moment".


In reality, it takes milliseconds for that focus to shift but also to be lost. How can something so powerful also be so fleeting?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I decided for myself at least that once you arrive at that place in your thinking, suddenly it becomes peculiar to be thankful for something so specific you didn't even realize you were missing. Unexplainably, the smallest, least expected moments are the ones that change you in ways your logic cannot reason. What I take from all this thinking is how crude gratitude creates an intangible feeling words cannot describe.


...There are so many things to which we can give our attention, our time and focus.
Why waste our "moments".
As the New Year approaches I will hold-on to this desire. To let nothing keep me from collecting the moments that weave the tapestry of my life.
Would it hurt any of us to try and find something good in everything.
If you’re ever going to take a chance or a risk, this is the one that cannot fail you; and if you decide to do it now, but think you can't, choose too! ~Namaste~ <3 p="">

 

When the mind bleeds out

"There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed."

~ Ernest Hemingway

THE THOUGHT, THE BIRTH, THE RESULTS

I am looking

"I am looking for the human who admits his flaws Who shocks the adversary by being kinder not stronger."


What would that be like? 


We don't even know." 


Naomi Shihab Nye